tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8939951804632494408.post1096683644661740018..comments2023-08-06T04:09:05.980-05:00Comments on Cornell DeVille : Entry 46Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8939951804632494408.post-91114513510155489932010-04-14T12:53:16.360-05:002010-04-14T12:53:16.360-05:00I don't get a sense of what the title means fr...I don't get a sense of what the title means from the query, BUT I thought the query itself was stellar. Great voice, great stakes.<br /><br />Nicely done!MarcyKatenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8939951804632494408.post-54622691571310334392010-04-14T07:56:18.539-05:002010-04-14T07:56:18.539-05:00I'm a little sad that you lost the "silve...I'm a little sad that you lost the "silver medal" part, although I can see why it didn't work based on the focus of the query. However, I wonder if a lot of the first paragraph is leftover from that original query. Great voice in that paragraph (and the whole query), but do we need to know how they meet? Just something to think about if you're worried the query is too long.Sagehttp://sagelikethespice.wordpress.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8939951804632494408.post-8533196286971487212010-04-13T20:15:01.620-05:002010-04-13T20:15:01.620-05:00Great job! I'm not a big fan of contemporary ...Great job! I'm not a big fan of contemporary YA, it's just not for me, but this made me smile and laugh.Melissahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11886151771194369513noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8939951804632494408.post-90509950038259077562010-04-13T17:49:57.192-05:002010-04-13T17:49:57.192-05:00I really like this query. It gets a little muddle...I really like this query. It gets a little muddled in the fourth and fifth paragraphs, but I think the story remains clear and I think you've done enough with the voice to earn some requests.<br /><br />Love the word bitchcraft. Storing that one.<br /><br />Good luck!Liz Czukashttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15656897969180818333noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8939951804632494408.post-68761082231398087942010-04-13T14:19:55.064-05:002010-04-13T14:19:55.064-05:00Bitchcraft - hilarious!
I really like the tone yo...Bitchcraft - hilarious!<br /><br />I really like the tone you've set here - very relatable. <br /><br />Can't really find anything to fault,but I'm not an agent.Cordelia Dinsmorehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10704456269484202163noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8939951804632494408.post-32574172278787900932010-04-13T10:38:24.804-05:002010-04-13T10:38:24.804-05:00I like this one. It's well written and I love ...I like this one. It's well written and I love the voice. Many teenage girls will relate to it.<br /><br />Love the word, Bitchcraft. I can see that being used by kids too.<br /><br />Good luck.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03216407428320615449noreply@blogger.com