Dear Agent of My Dreams:
I am seeking representation for my 350-word Picture Book, Lavender, which is included. Lavender is proof that best friends see past their differences.
When an energetic elephant arrives in a child’s bedroom in search of a playmate, chaos rules the day. LAVENDER’S intentions are good; he just wants to play. But he has a long nose for trouble, and it leads from one misadventure to the next. When he uproots the flower garden and turns it into a quagmire, the mud starts flying. Mommy gathers up the offenders and herds them inside for a bath. After a thorough scrubbing, it’s time for a nap. And if you think a purple elephant isn’t cuddly, then you must meet Lavender.
Thank you for your consideration. I look forward to hearing from you.
I'm not great with queries for picture books, but I really love your query. The story sounds delightful and you've made it come alive.
ReplyDeleteThe only problem I think maybe the first line. I'm not sure if agents will like being called the agent of your dreams. It sounds a little bit too much to me. I could be wrong though. That's just my opinion.
Good luck with it.
I agree with Trish. I'm not good with queries for picture books, but this sounds awesome. I wish you the best of luck with it. Also, I know that you'll switch the "Agent of my dreams" to a real agents name when the time comes, so I wouldn't worry about it for now. :)
ReplyDeleteIt's cute, just make sure that Lavender doesn't come of sounding so much like a huffalump.
ReplyDeleteThis is lovely, I would definitely buy this for my little girl (I can just see that purple elephant). I do hope it sees its way into publication.
ReplyDeleteI love the idea for this book. Your paragraph describing the book, however, might go too in depth. Because the book is only 350 words, I almost get the feeling that I know the entire book. Why would I need to read it? We don't want that for your query, so I would suggest cutting everything after the sentence describing his misadventures and long nose. :)
ReplyDeleteThe first paragraph could go into that last paragraph to finish off the letter nicely. overall, this sounds like an awesome children's book. Good luck and hope this helps.